Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Can You Stop the Rain?

Now where did we leave off? Ahhhh yes ... that Monday night when I had "the talk" with The Wife. Well, the attempted talk, that is. And still no resolution on the status of our so-called marriage.

So as Jen described in her post, I kept her abreast of what was going on through a series of texts that night. And while I could tell she truly felt my pain - as she had lived through nights like these so many times with her ex -- I still knew in my heart that this would likely be the straw that broke the camels back ... That finally pushed her over the edge and to the point where she would say "I just can't take it any more". And of course -- as is well-documented in my posts here -- with her appointment with her therapist looming only 3 days away, I just knew it would get worse long before it would have any chance to get better.

So a couple days - Tuesday and Wednesday -- were spent on pins and needles. There really was no sense in wallowing in small talk and relationship building, since Therapy Thursday would render all that meaningless anyway. So we bode our time until her appointment that mid-Thursday afternoon.

And I waited ... and waited ... the appointment came and went and I monitored my Yahoo IM account at work waiting for her to come online, not really being able to focus on anything work-related. And eventually, there she appeared. We chatted briefly online, then she called me.. And for awhile we talked about anything BUT what was said in her session, making mostly small talk about some problems she was having with her swimming pool.

But as the conversation waned, I knew there was no point in delaying the inevitable. I asked "So I understand if you don't want to talk about this now or on the phone, but we're going to have to eventually. How did your appointment go?"

And then I could her her sniffling, the tears, and the pain in her crackling voice when she finally said "I think I'm going to have to take a break from all this .. I just can't take this anymore..."

And from there the conversation continued for awhile, but we knew as we spoke that this would probably be the last time we talked ... So we hung on -- for quite awhile .. But finally, our goodbye's were said ...

And the phone clicked.... And the IM account went dark. And the cell phone didn't vibrate anymore ..

I made my way through the rest of that Thursday late-afternoon better than I expected, having a million other things to distract me that early evening, but finally I found myself alone in my car driving home from a youth baseball meeting. And to keep my mind off everything, I was listening to the NBA Draft on my SiriusXM satellite radio. But then - like a fool - I pushed the preset for the Love Channel .. And when Peabo Bryson's "Can You Stop the Rain" started to play, it finally hit me all at once ...

Baby, can you stop the rain from falling?
Won't you chase my clouds away?
I'd give anything to see the sun again,
Only you can stop these tears from falling

Only then did I realize ... she's gone .... And I sobbed uncontrollably the rest of the drive home.

Thursday turned to Friday .. which turned to Saturday ... and then?

Funny thing, those clouds started breaking up....

6 comments:

  1. Darn cliffhangers!!!

    Crying and driving is dangerous. I am still cheering for you guys, no matter what happens. The clouds always find a way to a little bit of sunshine.

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  2. Funny thing, those clouds started breaking up....

    This line kept me from breaking down and sobbing.

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  3. I wasn't gonna cry but I do wonder what was behind the clouds.

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  4. Al does a happy sunshine dance to drive away all dark clouds :]


    Hugs

    Al
    xxx

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  5. Great post!

    I think your dark clouds drifted my direction, though...

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  6. I know 'the ending' -- or that this gets better -- since I'm playing catchup, but I'm crying anyway.

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