Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Numbers Whores

A number of you have commented on my Hitting the Century Mark post of last week, as it highlighted the fact that I actually record and document our orgasms as they've occurred since we consummated our relationship back in the fall of 2009. No derogatory comments, mind you. Au contraire - most have been quite complimentary.

So yes -- I admit. The two of us are indeed numbers whores. While Jen does have a Math background, I will admit it was I that instigated the Orgas-O-Meter. Every since I was a kid playing Strat-O-Matic baseball, I've always loved tracking statistics. Heck, I'm still one of those geeks that keeps score at a baseball game, be it a 12U girls softball game or a Yankees-Red Sox game on ESPN Classic. I've just always been fascinated with numbers. And then you give a stat freak Google Analytics? Oh my God, its like giving an adulterous blogger free sex toys to review!! Oh wait a minute -- been there, done that.

So here's just a random sampling of stats that I've collected over the life of this blog since its inception in December of last year. Some are Google Analytics-based, some are sex based. Feel free to do what most people do with this kind of minutiae -- ignore it!!!
  • As of this writing, Jen is now up to 106 orgasms. Mark is at 91, leaving us 3 short of a combined 200. And remember, the rule is the orgasm has to be stimulated by our partner. No sitting home flogging the bishop watching YouPorn.
  • We’ve had 2,329 visits by 1,025 absolute unique visitors to our blog since we started tracking with Google Analytics back in late February. Our readers have originated from 47 different countries.
  • The only states not to visit us are Nevada, Wyoming, North and South Dakota and Hawaii. Nevada – home to “Sin City?” And they’re not interested in our tales of fornication? Are you kidding me?
  • Jen and I have had 49 unique sexual encounters, most of which have been at her house, in her bedroom. But we have fucked in her family room, as well as at a local hotel and a Southern California Hilton Garden Inn. For you savvy stats-masters out there, if you divide 197 orgasms by 49 encounters, that gives you a 4.02 orgasm-per-rendezvous ratio.
  • We had 16 orgasms between us during that Hilton Garden Inn getaway in December ’09, and followed that up two weeks later with a 15 climax extravaganza at a local hotel right before Christmas. December ’09 was our best fucking month ever (pun intended) with 38 orgasms between us.
  • Outside the United States and Canada, Australia has our most loyal readership. Thank you Loverboy and Alabaster Legs!
  • Discarding our home state which skewed our statistics before I figured out how to ignore hits from our own computers, New Jersey is home to the most visitors to our blog.
  • Throwing out our multi-day California and Christmas hotel fuck-fests, Jen’s best output has been 6 orgasms in one of our standard 2-to-3 hour sessions. My best is 3, and I’ve achieved that 9 times. Before Jen, my best ever was 2, and that was probably less than 5 times lifetime.
  • Because this is a family blog, I will forego the computational analysis of 91 Mark orgasms x one teaspoon of ejaculate per orgasm = …Oh never mind …. Don’t worry – we haven’t wasted a single drop. Jen and I are great cleaner-uppers!
  • And which blogger friend of ours has directed the most traffic our way? Why of course, none other than the Kingpin himself -- the Big Kahuna – the Grand Poobah – and dare I say it the Top Dog? Yes, our friend Riff Dog over at Ashley and Me is our greatest source of referring traffic. And by an order of magnitude. But that’s not to diminish the visitors directed our way by our good friends Frances and Daniel over at 29 Pearls, Scorpio at I’m Not a Sex Addict I Don't Go To Meetings, and Chloe, the Unfaithful Soccer Mom and inspiration for our blog. And here’s a shout-out to the Eternal List, the Happily Married Wife, Nitebyrd and The Cheat for putting us on their blog roll and sending visitors our way.


  1. Oh interesting what and how do I get a counter for my blog if you can share it
    i love to track mine i seen I have 2500 at my profile but no clue how man at blog
    thanks, and I loved this entry

  2. Ms. Muse: Thanks for stopping by and becoming a Follower of our blog. As much as we love our numbers, we love the attention and the comments even more! And I'd be more than happy to give you instructions on how to set up a counter on your site. Send me an email at mark.fooledaround@gmail.com and I'll get you on your way.

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  4. Wow! Those are some really good numbers!
    I don't have a blogger sidebar list yet. Eventually, I might get around to it....


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